Death of the Undertaker (4:26)

A short film produced for the London Bridge Festival 48hr Film Competition

10-12 July 2009

THE UNDERTAKER played by Lucy White

MAN IN SMOCK ONE played by Benjamin Hunt

MAN IN SMOCK TWO played by Merlin Fulcher

Photography by Rachel Aggs

Direction and screenplay by Merlin Fulcher

URL: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=16py7HePgiw

TRANSCRIPT

THE UNDERTAKER

Come about

On these Great Plains,

Smelling salts?

It was 1880

The great day of the Undertaker.

Our method was to institutionalize

The dead, I suppose.

But not that any means matters now.

(sigh)

Things were so more

Complicated in my youth

But now we never die

Young, and the Princes of the Blood

Re-arrange themselves for curry,

Cash, and all the dying beauty in the world.

‘My digital forecast and rain-checker

Will outlive us all’.

And O but for the mercy of

My profession we let the

Bodies lay where they fall.

Undertaking became a fraction

Of the over, making trouble

And the mob –

Mercenary fever swept upon

The dusty flappers of the poor –

And by no means was anybody rich.

And that left me

Of all of England and the Thames

And Walbrook Stream

Open to the Gods of fortune,

A Survivalist, or scion

Of Recruiters.

A little chapter in unfurling times;

Walk with me and learn the

Dying rites of kind.

Looking for a job?

Lovely; you’re our kind of guy –

Almost like the one I envisaged.

No! too strong, … too strong.

Re-arrange the template – debris –

I saw it dispersed to my displeasure.

We’re looking for a team player

One who can muck-in,

Lend-a-hand with this

Poly-satin ribbon faded dream.

Prospects, education, fractionating columns?

Do you love multi-tasking?

Freebase?

Are you reliable?

Tell me all about yourself.

(sigh)

There’ll never be another,

Not in all of who-knows-where

Lamentable,

The world turned

But I’m still searching.

Let’s see,

He’s a little brusk

Charlie and cheeky too;

One step over the broom,

His friend with a mop –

Straight down from the fields of heaven

And into my municipal trap.

‘Ello luv’ says he.

A right charmer, we’ll see!

Walking about the plotlines

And novel twists of time.

For undertaking he’s a mercenary fellow –

That’s right.

Taking hers and mine and

Getting our Red job done,

Not death – becoming –

We discussed this one earlier.

‘Not me’ says he to the

Taxman, the stranger.

His eyes beam green

At anonymity –

How pitiful we never meet

Exchange glances, my

Life chances – and the

Shriveling of his dreams.

This peaceful fellow’s a rest;

So I’ve got to snare him

And out with the trade show

All over again: darn it

Where’s my specs?

Like all professionals we expect

A good rate of return on

Our investment; we learn a

Business or a trade and

Maximize the output or largess –

The opportunities for advancement

Being manifold – and with times’

Chance – we became the

Working man’s Dalit – the

Trade to beat all others.

Employment or die!

Or life-like gnome:

You decide.

Trade show: The Bonanza

Ladies, not the butterfly

Come closer, yes,

This will revolutionize –

You’ve heard it before?

Rubbish:

Now this here is living

The undertaker way;

A sharp glass of porter

And the Thames in your face.

Say good-bye to air-flow

Filtration, central heating

And the sterilization room.

Self-employed?

I’ll tell you now;

We’ve got more than the

Healthcare-come-military complex

Could offer:

The unending tyranny of self-discipline,

Nah, just kidding!

Life is work plus leadership.

-         Or Leisure whatever way. 

END